Body wise, I’m five-sixish with butterscotch hair and I’m a tad overweight at the moment. Too much stress eating after getting dumped, which I’m not talking about, well, not much. Mentally, I’m on a quest to get my, um, crap, together, which includes trying to put together a workshop to “desuckify” guys.
2. Do you have any pets?
Right now, I’ve got one bossy cat I rescued who counts me as his minion. When I lived in San Antonio, Spotty McSpotty, my neighbors’ Dalmatian used to come over to my house and keep me company after I had a car accident. We’d watch movies together. His favorite was 101 Dalmatians, of course. Mine was, um, is Bridget Jones’s Diary.
3. What was high school like for you?
Well, I wasn’t popular or a prep or a jock or a cheerleader. More of a geek and a loner I guess. I liked history and literature and my mother got me interested in psychology. I did help out with a few musicals for theater class, mainly dancing in the chorus line.
4. What was your first job?
Caring for tomato and pepper plants for Mrs. Chapa, an elderly neighbour we met when Mom and I first moved to L.A. She paid me to plant and water and weed her tomato and pepper plants since she couldn’t bend because of bad knees. She paid me three dollars a week, if the plants lived and grew. During a heat wave one week, I lost quite a few and my mom made me return two bucks to her.
5. What are your flaws and your strengths?
I have too many flaws to count. Seriously. I can over react to things and say stuff I should keep to myself. Sometimes I’m a candy-ass people pleaser, and boy does that get me in trouble. I jump to conclusions when I should take a few deep breaths and cool off. As for strengths, I’m an idea person. I get them all the time. I’m glad I do. The problem is I have zero follow through. I don’t take action and then my ideas drift away. I’m learning how not to do that now. I learning how not diminish my idea so I don’t have any energy left to go forward with it.
6. What scares you?
Getting stuck in a rut scares me and I’m beginning to think I’m a commitment phobe, and why not since my love life had been so disastrous. I’m also really scared of being an idea person who never, ever acts on her ideas. That could be an epic fail, and a very sad life.
7. Tell us about your love life.
I believe there’s only one word to describe it at the moment: sucks.
Right out of college I married Evan and thought it would last forever. It didn’t. And that experience kept me from getting seriously involved for five years with anyone else. Then I met Theo and It really seemed to me like we were ready to connect and take it to the next level, and then he walked out on me without a word. Arrgh. Men. They drive me crazy.
8. Okay, well then how about this one. Have you ever broken the law?
I’ve gotten four speeding tickets driving through Texas. In LA, I once rolled through a stop sign while looking at this beautiful Australian shepherd and a cop nailed me for a moving violation. My friend Pilar and I had a quarrel during a shopping trip and I ran after her, forgetting I hadn’t yet paid for the sweater I’d tried on. Security came after me and I was sure I’d be arrested. Luckily, I’d dropped my purse on the countertop during the quarrel and when I ran after Pilar so I told the cop. Then Pilar assured the shop’s owner that leaving my purse meant I was coming back to pay for the sweater. She can talk anyone into anything, that girl.
9. She sounds like a great friend. How long have you known her?
We met freshman year in college and have been buddies ever since. We shared classes in psychology and have gone through some tough times together, especially during my divorce and the birth of her son Todd. I think those tough times made us even closer.
10. What the worst thing you’ve done while drunk?
During my freshman year in college, Pilar and I drove to Rosarito Beach to spend spring break week in a condo with two other friends. The first day we had sangrias at breakfast and margaritas at lunch. Then we decided to order the diablo margaritas while we stretched out on beach towels under the blazing sun. When we woke up we were both crispy bright orange and howling in pain. For the rest of the week, we stayed in our darkened room, lathering aloe vera lotion on and listening to the party going on all around us.
11.Do you cook? If so, what’s your favorite meal to make?
I go for simple food for the most part. Tacos are easy, so is grilled cheese but for a special treat I’ll make shrimp curry. It’s not as good as the curry I’ve had in Thai and Indian restaurants, but it hits the spot, especially when I use coconut milk and lime.
12. Who is your favorite villain on TV?
That little twerp King Joffrey in Game of Thrones made me want to throttle him. Eli Gold in The Good Wife isn’t really a villain but I love his deviousness, and, of course, there’s Olivia Pope’s mother and father in Scandal...yikes what a marriage that must’ve been.
13 .If an actress played you in a movie who would it be?
Emma Stone. Those big eyes and that great throaty voice. My own voice pitches too high, so I’d love a deeper, sexier voice.
14. Bellini or margarita?
I love both, but I recently had a Bellini that won me over. Super-fantastic.
15. Do you prefer boxers or briefs?
Depends on the man but I gotta say boxers do turn me on.
16. Swimming or volleyball?
Swimming because I like the zone you get into if you’re in a lap pool.
17. Who do you share your secrets with? Pilar and my other BFF, Mimi.
We’re the three musketeers... without swords or candy bars.
18. Are you ready to fall in love again?
That’s a tricky question. I think I am. But until you’re out there in the world and being open to the vibes, well, you don’t know for sure. I’ve learned that even though you might say you want something, your actions tell the real story. Don’t you think?
Divorced five years and recently dumped by Theo, Dorsey Bing brainstorms about a dating workshop for divorced people. Too bad she’s an idea person with zero follow-through. That changes when her pal, Pilar, sets up the workshop, puts herself in charge and gets Dorsey to be her “gofer.” Dorsey’s widowed stepfather Ralph, and his bride-to-be, Audrey, ask Dorsey to join their wedding cruise to Cabo, which will be held on the same weekend. Dorsey and Pilar nip that problem by holding the workshop during the cruise. But do things ever work out as planned. No. No, they don’t.
Everything goes topsy-turvy with a startling mishap, rebellious workshop attendees and the arrival of Audrey’s good-looking but wily nephew Finn. More trouble comes with the unexpected re-appearance of Theo. Will Dorsey and Theo revive their relationship or will she discover Finn isn’t who she thinks he is? Facing failure and heartbreak, Dorsey must tackle her biggest challenge if she’s to win the love, and life, she’s always desired.
CeCe Osgood lives in Texas after many years in LA working in the film industry. Her writing career includes magazine articles and screenplays as well as being a freelance script analyst (main client HBO). She also has had two screenplays optioned.
Being a novelist has been her lifelong dream, and now it’s becoming her reality. Her debut novel, THE DIVORCED NOT DEAD WORKSHOP, a romantic comedy with a whopping side dish of chick lit aka lighthearted women’s fiction, is about dating after divorce. She loves red wine and hates pretzels. See more about her at http://www.ceceosgood.com